Pitt v. Navy Live!

To Save Dave, we need this lousy Pitt football team to pull out a victory tonight over Navy. I know it isn’t looking good but don’t give up hope we will succeed in our mission to keep Dave at Pitt and guarantee WVU at least one victory a year.

7:52 Curtis Martin is at the game HOORAY but the sad thing is that he might be the fastest player on the Pitt sideline tonight. Also, there may be more people at my house than at this game. Pitt football is in a sad state of affairs.

7:56 Seeing Roger Staubach on the sidelines gives me the perfect opportunity to say — How ‘Bout them Cowboys! They are 5 – 0 and ready for the shoot-out this Sunday against the Pats.

8:00 It’s that time EAT SHIT PITT, EAT SHIT PITT…oh wait SAVE DAVE, SAVE DAVE…

8:01 Severe Weather Advisory for Heinz Field! 100% chance of spit and slobber coming from the Press Box. “Thith ith going to be a interething.”

8:06 I want to say, “Thank You” to the Navy Midshipmen. They give their all on the field and put their lives on the line, once they graduate, for our freedom. THANKS

8:10 Pat Bostick gives this team the best chance to win. Too bad it took a couple injuries for Wanstache to realize this. GREAT JOB busted play already…this could be a hard game to watch.

8:15 First punt of the night and now we get to see Kaipo-Noa Kaheaku-Enhada. WOW big play this may be the end of Save Dave. If they trail at half Wanstedt may not be the coach for the second half.

8:18 Pitt just needs to run faster! TOUCHDOWN Navy

8:23 By the end of the game McCoy/Dorsett may be a Heisman frontrunner in the eyes of Holtz. Great 13 yard pass on a 3rd and 14. Good call on 4th and 1.

8:28 I think Slaton and White are the only two players in the Big East that have a chance at even getting invited to the Heisman ceremony. Edit the commercial with some highlights or something.

8:30 In the Heinz Red Zone and Pitt has scored a huge TD. Lou just thought the game was over…it is way past his bedtime.

8:35 Come on and give me a Sonic commercial. I love those two goof-balls. Primanti Bros. is WAY overrated.

8:40 I was hoping Lou’s dentures were going to fall out. Now that would’ve been good TV.

8:41 Rece Davis is going to use Kaipo-Noa Kaheaku-Enhada full name all night just to show off.

8:46 Going for it here is a decision Dave would make. If he does get fired I hope Pitt hires Paul Johnson.

8:52 The spot of the ball is the toughest play to review. If this call gets overturned the fix is in and the Save Dave campaign has caught on.

8:54 If Pitt plays this well against us we will score 84 points. 14 – 7 Navy and Dave just called for a re-fluff of his mustache.

9:00 Bostick just looked like a freshman girl, who was dressed like a whore, running to Chaser’s on a cold winter night in Morgantown.

9:04 Holtz should be fined $10,000 every time he brings up Notre Dame. It just gets annoying you pruney old man.

9:10 Mark May doesn’t piss me off as much as he once did but he went to Pitt so I still don’t like him. This Pitt D is full of holes and just not very good.

9:13 I thought Besong was going to Barrett Green that guy.

9:16 There was a Wolverine about to attack the Midshipmen in Assembly Hall. 21 – 14

9:21 If were a cornerback and anyone had hair hanging over their name I would pull it as much as possible. Is Curtis Martin HIGH he just said that Pittsburgh was crazy about the Panthers. They must’ve been committed because they aren’t at the damn game.

9:27 WHAT Lou is about to BITE Mark May or should I say GUM Mark May. Touchdown Pitt…I should’ve taken the over.

9:30 I can’t believe I’m about to say this but I agree with Lou. All college stadiums should be on campus to make it easy on the students. Then again if it is off-campus they can serve beer. Ehh, I can always sneak a flask in so on campus is better.

9:32 Charley West will take over for me at the start of Halftime. I have to spend quality time with my lady friend. It will take about a minute and thirty seconds, so I should be back later.

9:36 Paul Johnson just said a curse word. I bet those guys have never been yelled at before. God Speed Dave


Charley West at the helm. This live blog is either going to get much better or much drunker. Bet on both. Bitches.

Let’s get this fucking show on the road.


9:54 — If two teams score 42 points in a half and no one is there to see it, does it actually happen? If you came up with an answer for that, you’re probably high on peyote.

9:58 — Nothing like fireworks and a giant American flag to get 12,467 fans off their butts and cheering.

10:00 — Is Lou Holtz a hobbit? Anyone?

10:03 — What’s the over/under on WVU’s team score this year against Pitt? 100? 10,000? 123 x 10^7? Infinity?

10:07 — Do you think Reece Davis, working with both Lou Holtz and Mark May, cuts himself at night just to feel alive?

10:17 — This isn’t a bad game, but I’m hating every second of it.

10:21 — Navy runs the same play on every single play and I’m already more impressed with their gameplan than most Mountaineer games.

10:24 — How much do you think WBGV could get for an exclusive story revealing that tonight’s referee is actually an evil robot? Maybe he’s not even evil, just evil. Though, in my experience, all robots I’ve ever met have had murderous tendencies.

10:28 — Coming soon, the newest hit from the creators of Frasier, “Lou Eating A Sandwich.”

10:33 — FG Pitt. 20,000 fans rejoice…..45,000 fans not in attendance don’t give a shit.

10:39 — Pitt’s defense is doing it’s best impression of air.

10:44 — Quick puzzle: Pitt is AWF_L.

10:56 — I really have to piss, but I’m supposed to keep blogging. If I keep blogging and I don’t go piss, maybe I’ll die. Ahhh, sweet release from this game.

11:08 — Kind of a big play coming up. I’m guessing they call the barking dog play – except in football.

11:17 — Ballsy, ballsy call. Surely this is not the Dave Wannstedt we know and love. It must be….an IMPOSTER!

11:21 — Why go for it the first time and not the second? Glad to have the same lovable Dave Wannstedt back in my life.

11:40 — As much as I hate Pitt, this is a great game. No defense. All offense.

11:48 — If my memory serves me, the Navy has fighter bombers. Surely this is enough to overcome annoying Panther growls.

11:52 — Pitt’s going to win this game….

11:55 — Nevermind.

12:00 — I’m not going to lie, the “Save Dave” campaign is in trouble. Not all the tea in China could save this clown. Seriously, if you put a grapefruit on the sideline and strapped a headset to him, even he wouldn’t have called a fade pass to end the game. And in a pinch, the grapefruit is delicious and refreshing. What does Wannstedt have to offer? A mustache? Whatever.

12:04 — “Save Dave” merchandise will be on closeout starting tomorrow.

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21 Responses

  1. Pitt’s attendance is fucking embarassing to the Big East. I mean, seriously, do they not have any fans at all?

  2. They have always had fair weather fans but it still a sad sight.

  3. It took all of 3 minutes of game play to hear a LeSean McCoy-Tony Dorsett comparison. Wow.

  4. Some Whiskey and an eight-ball would make this game a whole lot more interesting.

  5. Remember a couple of years ago, right when the Big East split up and BC was still in it, and Pitt was supposed to be really good? Jesus, that feels like decades ago.


  6. Primanti Brothers is not at all over-rated. Those f’ing things are delicious. I like the cheesesteak variety personally. Nothing, though, can beat the Roethlis-burger. All the goodness of a Primanti topped off with two fried eggs. My heart hurts just thinking about all its yumminess.

  7. How many freaking McKillops can a team have? This 9th ranked Pitt defense sucks. RUN FASTER!

  8. That little Navy song the band does after every play is about as annoying as USC’s stupid Trojan march thing.

  9. Is that Lil’ Jon behind Dave on the sidelines?!?!

  10. It appears the Navy cadets in Annapolis are being forced to cheer against their will.

  11. They have to wake up at 6:00 tomorrow moring and run. They would probably rather be sleeping

  12. Good point.

  13. Yes, people in Pittsburgh are crazy about the Panthers. Can’t you see what a great atmosphere Heinz Field is tonight?

  14. Another extraordinarily insightful halftime interview by Wanny. God he’s a wretched coach.

  15. Say what you will about Pitt, but the cathedral of learning is very cool.

  16. I like fireworks.

  17. Fireworks discriminate against epileptics.

  18. re: Lou Holtz

    I don’t know what he is.

    I foresee plenty of Owen when we play Pitt. The Navy FB is gashing them.

    Epileptics have it rough.

  19. If Owen had punted that, there’d be a one-armed Panther lying on the field right now.

  20. Oh McCoy, that sucks for you.

    I don’t think that ball went thru the end-zone though.

    I hope it did!

  21. Lou laughs like a 12 yr old girl drunk on Zima. Not that I know what that sounds like…

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