Man, that headline has it all. And so do the pictures. Apparently, after UK had scored to go up 7-0 in the first quarter against Florida, the general rules of decorum were suspended briefly at Commonwealth Stadium.
Take it away, lucky Deadspin reader (only kinda NSFW):
Here’s the deal. 8:00 mark, 1st quarter, UK up a touchdown. Most people celebrate with high-fives and rocksplosions.
But the couple in front of me…not so much. They celebrate by straight up finger-banging. that’s how we roll in the bluegrass.
My girlfriend alerted me first of this hot public action. Then the chick to my left elbowed me pointing with disgust at the table-turning in the pants. (Apparently women can hear other women’s belt buckle coming undone.)
Then, basically, me and 32 others in the section watched with shock-and-awe for the next 3 minutes as this M.I.L.F. got her shit on.
Oh. Hell. Yes. I may be a lot of things, but I am most definitely a man that would unabashedly marvel at a girl getting fingered at a football game. I
might would absolutely borrow an older gentleman’s binoculars just to get a better look. This is the best story of the year, by far.
At the same time, though, it makes me sad. There I was, busy checking things off my “Fucking Awesome Things To Do At A Football Game” list and now I have to add something to the bottom. Oh well, I’m still young.