As we all probably know by now, Lou Holtz — the Patrick Henry of gameday shows — referenced Adolf Hitler when talking about Rich Rodriguez’s leadership skills. I wish I could tell you more than that, but unfortunately, the comment made absolutely no sense in context. Even so, we at WBGV believe that Holtz was on to something — he just needed us to take it a step further. So we are. Right…..now.
Head Coach ———- Führer und Reichskanzler
University of Michigan ———- Nationalsozialistische Deutsche Arbeiterpartei NSDAP
Claim To Fame
Inventing the spread offense ———- Exterminating approximately 6,000,000 Jews across Europe
(edge: definitely Rodriguez)
Rita Rodriguez ———- Eva Braun
(edge: Hitler…Braun was hot)
Too many bubble screens ———- Engaging in a land war in Asia
Jim Tressel’s Ohio State ———- FDR’s/Truman’s America, Josef Stalin’s USSR
2-5 overall, probable first losing season at Michigan since 1967 ———- Lost war against Allied powers, committed suicide in personal bunker
So, as you can see, right now Hitler is beating Rodriguez. But the season’s still young — Rodriguez has plenty of time to catch up. Maybe if he loses to Michigan State at home this weekend. That would certainly be a step in the right direction.
Also, he might want to consider invading Ohio. Though my guess is he’d keep running the same play over and over and never get past Toledo.
Filed under: the artist formerly known as CRR