Cleaning Out The Cobwebs

Now that my mom has cleaned up the Halloween decorations from my room, I figured I should clean out some thoughts and anger that have cluttered my mind. If you think Halloween movies are scary, just read on about the thoughts that randomly come into my head during the day.

Why do people yell at me to sit down when all the rows in front me are standing? You are not He-Man, the master of the universe, you selfish prick. I intentionally squeezed out a fart in that guys face in an attempt to make him stand-up.

I would really like to see the helmet Musket stickers come back. They may reward individual performances but they are guns and look sweet. The players should demand the right to wear them and if HCBS refuses they should claim it is a violation of their 2nd Amendment rights.

The fans/University should do a “white out” for Patrick White’s final home game as a Mountaineer. He is the greatest football player in Mountaineer history and deserves something special. Sure, fans could bring their own white shirts but the University should just spend some money and give every fan entering the game a white t-shirt. It would probably cost $60,000 or so.

The University should use the money they are stealing from fans that attend the EXHIBITION game on Saturday to pay for the “white out.” Are you seriously charging FULL PRICE for a fucking exhibition game? The game doesn’t count and I bet not all the concession stands will be open.

I give them credit for making money but fuck you Pastilong it is an exhibition game, asshole. Similar to the Gold-Blue game, the money should go to charity, “The Pat White, White Out Game Charity.”

Why don’t girls give head anymore? I have heard a number of guys complain about this recently. Sometimes I would like to play a little game called Hurricane; I try to hold on while the girl blows like hell.

Did that old big boob lady that ran onto the field to kiss athletes die? If so then this girl should take her place because DANG those are huge knockers.



8 Responses

  1. To your head inquiry….I blame Hillary Clinton and the damn feminists…

  2. the old boob lady was Morganna, and according to Wikepedia:
    She appeared in Playboy magazine, in June 1983, April 1985 and September 1989. During the 1990s she occasionally kissed minor league players.[2] Her last notable appearance before retirement was in the Farrelly brothers’ feature film Kingpin in 1996, appearing as herself. Morganna went into retirement at the end of 1999 and now lives in Columbus, Ohio. She no longer grants interviews or does appearances.

  3. I don’t know what kinda girls those guys meet. Who the hell would even talk to a girl that didn’t like to lick a dick-cicle.

  4. I agree with it all.. and to add one… WHY THE HELL ISN’T THE GAME TOMORROW ON A NORMAL CHANNEL?! No where in town even has Time Warner so we can’t even buy it for any price. Talk about one pissed fan…

  5. ESPNU is a normal channel. The cable companies here are a disgrace for not carrying it (or charging extra for it).

    Just channel surf through some of the shit Comcast offers. SiTV,? 5 different MTVs that all suck? I mean come on, who watches this shit?

  6. The best thing about leaving the great state of WV is that in other states they have fully functional cable services. My parents cable in WV is awful. I get about 200 more channels and pay about $20 less than they do for a horrible connection, bad HD, limited channels and a remote that was clearly designed in the early 80’s.

    I feel your guys pain but I have a solution. GO TO THE GAME SINCE YOU LIVE IN WV. My 12 hr round trip limits me to 3 games a season. Take advantage of being able to go to the game. I know if I was 3 hours out than I would be there for every game.

  7. Look for the Bearcats to expose the young, but improving, secondary of the Mountaineers tonight. I expect WVU to come out VERY LETHARGIC because they have all season, and then pick up their play as the game progresses. I think this is probably Cincy’s biggest game in their program history and therefore, think they could win this game in Mo-Town. Could easily see the Mounties handle the Bearcats, but just have that hunch today……Cincinnati-28, WVU-24 uggghhhhhh!

  8. Hey Nasti, it’s hard to go to a game when it’s sold out. And since I’m a poor college grad and can’t afford to pay the 200 bucks a ticket from a scalper, I can’t go. If you want to buy me a ticket off a scalper, I’ll be more than happy to drive to MoTown, drink my moonshine and coke, hide the flask in my bra, and freeze my nipples off.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: